Thursday, September 12, 2013

How fashion taught me to love myself

January 25, 2010

With a title like that I’m sure people will think that it’s a bit of a stretch to say fashion taught me self love but here’s a bit of my story. A few years ago I was very overweight, at 280 pounds I was very unhealthy, depressed, unmotivated and disliked myself more than anyone could have known just by looking at me. Fashion has always been something that I used as a way to express myself. In high school I allowed music to really influence my style and it’s when I first saw how feeling good was easier when there was a layer of interesting clothing on top of me. After high school a lot changed and a very big wave of depression hit. Not going anywhere I felt stuck, unhappy and very unattractive. After getting to my biggest size of 280 pounds I decided I was done with being so unhealthy and began my weight loss quest. I lost about 25 pounds that time and for once I really began changing the way I dressed. Inspired by classic fashion and fashion blogs I began to really start spending time looking up fashion trends, learning about designers and dreaming of a future in the industry. My original goal was to become a fashion photographer; I wanted to photograph beautiful pictorials for fashion magazines. I dreamed of Vogue, traveling the world photographing breathtaking pieces of art and doing what I loved so much. As a creative person photography has always been a huge part of who I am and this was a way for me to infuse it with something that at the time had no idea would become such a huge part of my life.  

December 5, 2011

I kept with my weight loss and really started to play with my style. Being a thriftier out of necessity as a young immigrant I was completely okay with and even enjoyed the hunt of second hand items. I started collecting bowties, vintage designer ties, blazers, dress shirts even a few pairs of shoes here and there. Suddenly I began to get attention from people because of my bowties or my blazers at non-formal events and I loved it. For once I felt comfortable in my own skin because I was able to dress it up using all kinds of neat tricks to make my body look more how I wanted it to just with the right blazer or layering. For a while I was happy with my chubby size and becoming comfortable with myself even while still overweight allowed me to learn to love me. Before this I had no idea what it felt like to look in a mirror and really think “damn I look good”. Even though I'd gained some confidence with my new style I eventually decided I wanted to be able to shop carefree at more stores. Even in America where the average weight is so much higher than other countries finding fashionable clothes that fit well in bigger sizes was hard. In July of 2012 I began my new quest for a better me. On August 2012 I weighed 225 pounds one year later I’m 165 pounds. While I can’t give fashion all the credit for learning to love myself enough to take care of my body, the goals to fit into the clothes I found inspiring was a very big part of my motivation. Fashion taught me that we’re all given a body but it’s up to us to dress and treat our bodies how you want it to be seen by others but the most important thing fashion has taught me that you're only as fabulous or beautiful as you see yourself.

December 21, 2012

In my blog I hope to explore my own style while learning from the hundreds of thousands of fashion bloggers around the world.
I hope to make fantastic friendships across oceans and perhaps even inspire a few people to seek a better version of themselves, weather that involves changing your body or just your pants.

I will also be posting some of my DIY’s as I learn to use my sewing machine better and I’ve already been requested from instagram to show how I’ve made some of my favorite accessories eventually moving on to altering clothing. I look forward to reading other blogs and hope to help others find their little square in the fashion world. 

                                           August 2012                    July 2013